slightly obnoxiously endearing excuses/references

Watch out, Alex is taking over the blog!!! She can't be tamed.

--we will return after these short messages--
Talking about yourself in the third person again? Are your friends starting to think of you of the annoyance that should not, under any circumstance, be invited to social gatherings? Dr. Backterfirst can help you! No, this is not Dr. Backterfirst speaking. This is someone else. Call 1-800-I Can't Think Of Anything Witty.
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*long exhale* I can't explain myself. This is fitting actually, because hayleyghover* posted a video response on YouTube today about excusing your behavior with pop culture references until it isn't funny anymore and then continuing to do it until it is. Funny again, I mean.

I was having so much fun reading the comments of that video that I thought I would bring them over here. Also, I am devoid of original ideas. Also, I thought it would be useful to have a database of excuses that are not only hilarious but also valid. Use at your own risk.

My own idea is from The Breakfast Club. Whenever someone has a general complaint about the state of the world, I'll say, "Screws fall out all the time, the world is an imperfect place."
I don't think anyone else gets it but I enjoy the reference.


I also explain my more absurd behavior by saying, "Cause I'm hot like that." I think it covers a diverse range of actions.


A lot of other things I say can be traced directly back to Gilmore Girls. Honestly, I've gotten so many of my expressions from Gilmore Girls that I don't even remember where they came from. Except I know they probably came from Gilmore Girls, especially when I'm watching reruns. Thank you, Amy Sherman Palladino. You rock my world.


Now for the rest, curteousy of YouTube. Usernames should be linked, some have been slightly edited for context. I hope this helps you with your random referencing. Tell me in the comments how many of the actual references (rather than the random responses) you got.

Something inexplicable or out of the blue happen? Say:

 "It must have happened because the plot demanded it." ThongManX

Need to distract from a topic? Say:

"Then tell me this, why is a banana radioactive?" ThatAaronWilsonKid 

Awkward silence? Remedies:

Sing the Lion King opening. "The Circle of LIIIIIIIIFE." imnotuniqueimmonique

Say, "Don't blink. Blink and you're dead!" ageeksrevenge

Do you need a strongly vocalize your disagreement with someone? Yell:

"YOU'RE A LIAR!" CatrionaHD or

"Your comment is completely irrelevant." or

"SHE DOESN'T EVEN GO HERE!" nerdgrlsquared 

Need a scapegoat? Blame...

Warner Chilcott. Seaphire7 or

..,it on the alcohol. Eiznekcam4

or say:

 "F**kin' Lauren." iamtheveggiemonster 

Did someone just tell you to stop? Say

•  "collaborate and listen," or
• "Hammer time!" or
• "in the naaaame of love." alliekat16 

Confused? Say:

 "WHAT THE DEVIL IS GOING ON HEAAAAAHHHHHH?????" tinallama11

Are other people confused because of something you've said? Say:

"Just because you have the emotional range of a teaspoon!" or 

"I'M NOT AN OWL!" wazzuphan

Need to warn a friend off something? Say:

"Don't go down there, Mr. Frodo." GreenFairyPrincess 

Is someone trying to make you do something untrue to who you are? Scream:

"GIRLS JUST WANNA HAVE FUN!!!!!" Tree023 

Just want people to leave you alone?

"I'm a child of divorce, give me a break." peridotbaby or

"VOLDEMORT KILLED MY PARENTS!" ohceecee

People trying to get you down? Tell 'em:

 "You can't stop the beat!' nerdygeekydorkygirl 

Need to convince some of your plans worthiness? Say: 

"IT'S FOR THE GOOD OF THE PEOPLE." SaoPauloOrBust

Impressed or sarcastic? Say, while clapping: 

Great story. Tell it again. gredandforge7

If a friend does something noteworthy: 

"You go Glen Coco!" Beniqwa 

Feel like expressing anger but not quite sure how? Say:

"My name is Indigo Mantoya, you killed my father, prepare to DIE." FiveFangirlsFTW

Need an epic way to end a story or blog post? Say:

 "And then they made me their chief." HallowsNotHorcruxes7  

*Who, in case you were wondering, was my introduction to the John Green's books (I read An Abundance of Katherines first) and thus the vlogbrothers.