I just wanted to express how happy I am that I did not start school at age five. I'm so incredibly grateful that I haven't been conditioned for boredom. I'm not a worker, I'm a contributor. Sometimes that feeling hits me and all I can think is, "Thank you, mom. Thank you for caring. Thank you for not wanting me to go away for half of my waking hours. Thank you for letting me live."
Because that's how I feel. I feel like I've had a chance to live while everyone else has been shuffling from class to class. And I'll be the first to admit that I don't have the fullest perspective, never having been to 'real' five days a week school before but I feel like I know a few things. One of those things is that schools don't teach you how to learn, they teach you how to pass tests. I don't feel like kids graduate from high school with an open mind and a passion for learning new things. Graduation doesn't seem like a celebration of learning and curiosity, it seems like a ceremony to say, okay you've survived this far, good luck with university (or cleaning toilets if you chose not to go), go drink beer illegally and try to forget the hellish experiences you've had.
And that's not cool with me. Or Erica Goldson of Coxsackie-Athens High School, apparently. (that link goes to a real high school graduation speech where a real valedictorian talks about the school system and why is sort of sucks)
So I've spent the last three days waking up at 7:30 to get on the bus to go to school and teach English (same as I did in March, if you remember) until 3:30 when I go home and crash because I'm so tired. Perhaps it's because I haven't been accustomed to this idea of life before but I don't understand how you normal school kids can function. How do you have time for what you love? How can you manage to sit in a chair for so long every day? You all amaze/horrify me.
And so the weird girl becomes even more accustomed and appreciative of her own weirdness. She will wake up at 9 and look in the mirror at her pajama clad, bedheadedness and smile because life is good. The reason for getting out from under the warm covers isn't a chemistry test but a chapter floating around in her head for her novel, waiting to be written.
Basically, I'm trying to say I'm sad that you're all going back to school in a couple weeks and I wish you were here, experiencing life like the one I live, even if you're fine with staggering through a couple more years of high school. I guess I'm kind of sad that so many kids will accept boredom so easily. And I don't know what to do about that.
2 comments:
I'm writing a blog post in response to this because I have a lot to say that won't fit into this comment.
However, I will say that the reason so many students "accept boredom so easily" is because they (we?) don't have any other options. In many cases, it's either public school or no school, and whatever flaws the public school system may have, it's a hell of a lot better than no education at all.
And that is why I have a love/hate relationship with public schools: for the sake of myself and for the sake of humanity, I am so damn grateful that they exist and I kind of want to punch every person who is in favor of privatizing education. On the other hand, they DO have a lot of flaws (many of which you mentioned in this blog post) and it's a shame that we have to settle for something so important yet so screwed up.
If you want to do something about it, work on a way to improve public schools. :)
I too have a blog-length opinion on this, which I'll post tomorrow (& post it here, since it's relevant to yours.)(also computer availability/functionality permitting. . .)
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