(I'm just going to go ahead and say this is an update blog. I'm alive, if that's all you're going to skim this for. ;))
1. I hardly ever expect things to be going smoothly. If things ever seem that way, I assume that things are going so horribly my mind has collapsed and has gone into completely-not-giving-a-shit mode to protect itself.
2. When I do finally convince myself that things are not totally falling to shit, "okay" is never good enough. "Okay" is mind-numbing routine.
For right now, at least, it's not been like that. I've accepted that on a day to day basis there will end up being unexpected crap parts and equally unexpected good parts. It used to be that I would have these preconceived notions about days being good vs. bad based on assorted tasks/activities to be completed within that 24 hour period and my corresponding dread/excitement about those things.
Have I reached the peak of mental nirvana known as maturity by not getting so consumed in the quality of my everyday experiences, or does this acceptance prove that I'm just as apathetic as ever? Am I being an adult (kind of), or am I completely delusional?*
* "or am I completely delusional?" is, as always, a viable option, and must be considered when asking any introspective rhetorical question.
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