Srsly, folks. I'm going to start with an analogy:
Remember what Vita said about guilt over not crying during Deathly Hallows? Today was like that.
Oh, the things Catholicism does, even to the non-practicing association. To be fair, I didn't know the dead guy. Or if I did, I hadn't seen him (or almost anyone else in attendance) in 11-12 years. No emotion connection to be mourned, more a general realization of mortality itself and how much it sucks.* I'm not saying that being in a church during a funeral mass wasn't awkwardly depressing, it was. At points I cried out of guilt that I *wasn't* crying previously, which makes no sense at all. Other times I stared at various windows intently (one thing about churches--and maybe I'm just nerdy enough to appreciate this--but the architecture is really awesome to look at) and mouthed the occasional response to a prayer or some such. Also reflected upon my own funeral (morbid and selfish, but why not. . .) and pondered music selections.**
I didn't mean for this blog to sound as awkward and un-relatable as it may be, but it's how I spent my afternoon. Moral of the story: Death sucks, let's all live until science has figured out immortality.
Footnotes:
* Crass as it is, there are some times when the adverb "balls" is effective and necessary. Mortality sucks balls.
** The only qualification now withstanding is that all songs be in English.
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