Monday, March 1, 2010

in which I use too many exclamation marks for no reason other than that I am CHIPPER (also for no reason)!

HELLO, DEAR READERS!

So as to keep the boat of life flowing down the same river, if you will, my teachers have yet again assigned me a lot of homeworky shit that I would prefer not to do! But as they say, a leak in the ship doesn't cause total sinkage! And so I am taking the mermaid by the fins and CONTINUING ON!

This morning in the class of our native language (English), we ventured to the mysterious and exciting dwelling also known as the library. As you can imagine, all was not well upon our arrival; namely, about half the computers were marked with the YELLOW PLAGUE* and were thus unfit for usage. THEREFORE, I and some other people were sent to the BOOK AREA to research using NON INTERNET MATERIALS. This was too crazy for us to handle**, so naturally we turned to other entertainment devices.

You know what I'm talking about - a book about banned books! Awesome, am I right or am I right? I LOVE reading banned books lists because, hey, what better way to rub it into book banners' faces that they failed to wipe said book off the face of the Earth than READING THEM, or even better, READING A LIST ABOUT THEM?

Books that were banned:

- The Bible (it IS pretty violent. Also, trippy)
- Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's Stone (already knew this one, but it's still STUPID!)
- To Kill a Mockingbird (also knew this one. Reasoning: it contains offensive racial material! Big issue with this argument: IT'S A BOOK ABOUT A FUCKING RACIST TOWN***, what do you expect it to be like? "Oh, and THEN we all had a nice BONFIRE and HELD HANDS and SUNG SONGS whilst Atticus whistled in the background and we all supported Tom Robinson WITH OUR HEARTS!" Also if I am correct, and I know I am, the book is criticising racism, not promoting it. Thus: FAILURE on the banners' part)
- The Autobiography of Benjamin Franklin!**** (What scandalous secret is Benjamin hiding that I don't know about? AM CURIOUS)

* About half of them had yellow stickers on them, and the libraryish people said we couldn't use the ones with yellow stickers for reasons unknown
** Also I was feeling really lazy! And all of my sources are on the computer! And there were more interesting things to do! YAY!
*** And other things, but you see my point
**** May be called something else, but that's what it is

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