Sunday, June 14, 2009

(mostly) Shameless Quoting

Alas, it is Sunday, my day to write again. And yet, what to say? There seem to be no questions to answer, and no topic springs to mind immediately, so here I sit.

I'm going to do a bit of chattering.

I want to go on a roadtrip. Not a planned destination one like my family went on last summer, but a 'pack-your-bags-and-head-for-the-car-and-don't-bring-a-map-because-maps-are-for-the-weak' road trip. I want to grab some money--from where I do not know--and pull out of the driveway and get on the highway and drip, stopping to see random roadside attractions and for bathroom breaks, of course. I guess I'll have to learn how to drive first, and for that to happen I'll need to be the legal driving age. So I guess it'll have to wait a few years...

I just finished re-reading An Abundance of Katherines, which is probably what gave me the brilliant idea I just told you about. I love this book. The first time I read it I laughed as many times. There was some huge fits of laughter, some smaller chuckles and many snorts of amusment. It's one of my favourite books. I don't know whether the two of you have read it, but if not I suggest you do that with haste. I even bought a copy; it was on sale and I couldn't resist.

Whenever I read a particularly hilarious line I also wanted to share it with someone; my mom, my sisters, whoever was in the room at the time. I did this often, and I think everyone probably got a little tired of hearing me say, "Listen, I want to read you something." But here you are, a somewhat willing audience, and though it's not the same to type quotes into a blog and have you read them, because I don't get to enjoy you laughter, I'm still going to share some of my favourite parts of the book. This time reading it, I had some Post-Its on hand so I don't even have to riffle through the pages to find the quotes. They're all right there...

" 'Well, while you were in the bathroom, I sat down at this picnic tables here in Bumblefug, Kentucky, and noticed that someone had carved that GOD HATES FAG, which, aside from being a grammatical nightmare, is absolutely ridiculous. So I'm changing it to 'God Hates Baguettes'. It's tough to disagree with that. Everybody hates baguettes.' "
-Hassan, An Abundance of Katherines (John Green), page 22

(Colin is about to call ex-girlfriend, Katherine)
" 'Right, but you're a Dumpee. Dumpees don't call. You know that, kafir. Dumpees must never, never call. There's no exception to that rule. None. Never call. Never. You can't call. Don't do it dude. You're pulling the pin on a grenade. You're covered in gasoline and the phone is a lit match.' "
-Hassan, An Abundance of Katherines (John Green), page 87

"He wasn't really going on a hunt anyway. He was going for a stroll through the woods. With a gun."
-Colin, An Abundance of Katherines (John Green), page 156

" 'We went to all these lame-o homeschooling events together. Like, bring your homeschooled kid to the park so she learns how to be less nerdy. And, take your homeschooled kid for a homeschool picnic to the Muslim kid can get his ass kicked by all the evangelical Christians.' "
-Hassan, An Abundance of Katherines (John Green), page 163

I'm not going to ask a question because you both have enough of those to be getting on with. I feel like a bit of a cheater for filling my blog with quotes, but at least they're good quotes. That's a comfort.

1 comment:

Vita said...

ROAD TRIPS YAY! I am WITH YOU on that. Like you, I'd have to learn to drive first, but I find the whole idea of road trips to be quite ALLURING. Right, who needs a map anyway? If Colin and Hassan had used a map, they never would have landed in the Middle of Nowhere, Tennesse, and then the book would have no plot and then the world would END. D: