pooh! prefix textualism smudgedly

Thanks, random phrase generator!

Even if you grammatically make no sense. K THNX BAI!

On to the questions! (both bound to be lengthy answers, so let's not waste time!)

Alex: Do you have any fond childhood memories to share? Favourite birthday/Christmas gift (wait, do you guys celebrate Christmas? Am I being close-minded?)? Injuries worth note? Do tell.

Let's put it this way; if I were to document all of these memories (EXCLUDING the "normal" ones) I would end up with about 8 typed pages. And to answer your question-within-a-question, "technically" I celebrate Christmas. In the way that I like old Christmas tv specials and getting STUFF and 2 weeks off school. Not really in a religious sense.

In your actual question, I don't really remember any gifts worth memory-making. I was not one of those long lists to Santa kids. In fact, (adding to my childhood oddities) When I was about 5 I stopped asking Santa for exact things and just asked for COLD HARD CASH. (this made my dad nearly cry laughing, almost blowing Santa's cover...) I don't have any "conventional" birthday stories such as, "When I was 6 I desperately wanted a puppy and *POOF*, that year I got one and named her Sparkle Princess."
And, strangely, as klutzy as I am, I seem to kind of bounce back when I fall, trip, wobble, ect... which I do plenty of. I have never really broken a bone. Lucky me. Although they do seem to create some interesting stories. I have nearly hundreds of other similarly odd tales from my childhood, so I'm going to describe two (breaking the question rule, I know... wait, are there rules???) my earliest memory and one I remember for no particular reason.

Earliest: Halloween when I was around two and a half. I was a ballerina, and after posing in many "ballerina-y" poses, I thought I could prove I was a SINGING ballerina. So, my parents, in an attempt to humor me, (and in retrospect, to save the tape for posterity...) brought out a tape recorder (ahh, 90s technology. How I miss thee.) and told me to sing. The first thing on this tape is me yelling over my dad's voice, "I DON'T WANNA SING ANY MORE!!! TURN IT OFF!" This goes on for about four more minutes, my dad coaxing me to at least sing Twinkle Twinkle Little Star or something (so their efforts to jump-start my singing career would not totally be in vain) I finally get fed up and run around screaming LA LA LALA LA and popping balloons. End tape.
Weird: In kindergarten, at the beginning of the year, we had a "kindergarten circus", which was us performing little mini circus acts. I WANTED to be a clown, but alphabetical order screwed that one. My second choice was snake charmer (because I thought it would involve REAL snakes. Further weirdness.) so that's what I got, and it was the first act. I stood in line "backstage" behind the "ringmaster", one of my soon-to-be best friends. (It's a miracle we got past this) I had a bit of a problem understanding the concept of "personal space" back then. So I was about this close to her, and for some reason I sniffed her hair. I still remember it smelled like vanilla and coconut. So I complimented her hair scent about 2 seconds after she went on "stage". She didn't hear me, so OF COURSE I had to yell "I LOVE HOW YOUR HAIR SMELLS!" Now she heard me. So did all of the "audience". (our parents)

Vita: If you could solve one major (but specific) issue today, what would it be? That could include stopping the genocide in Darfur, providing literally global health care, getting rid of your country's debt, etc.

I would have to choose between global healthcare and ending global warming. They both help the entire globe and everyone on it. But, I can* think up a completely unreasonable way to connect them, to PROVE I could kill two birds with one stone with this wish:

If global warming ended, then the amount of people dying from heat stroke and/or skin cancer would go down. Things would grow more easily in places affected by global warming (that are now not), providing more healthy, affordable food. Scientists would stop devoting their time to the study of global warming, and more time developing cures for diseaes. All of this, in theory, would eliminate most diseases and hopefully make health insurance more afforadable as well.

* Not that any of this would probably happen, but I'm just trying to justify my point that these two wishes are interconnected, and thus, could be solved in one wish.